Acknowledging those that can't attend

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  1. It’s so fantastic that you’ve all made such a huge effort to come here today, but we’d also like to pay thanks to those who weren’t able to make it, because they are 111. No, wait sorry I read that wrong. They’re not 111, they’re ILL.

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  2. The buffet this evening is charged on a cost-per-head basis. So, I’d like to thank the following people for not coming… Oh, before I start, if you are here, we will still look upon you favourably should you find an excuse to leave before the main course.

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