Father of the Bride jokes for weddings in January

The best thing you can do to keep any speech relevant and fresh is to have a few topical jokes thrown in to the mix. These should all be related to the day and occasion though; this isn't your audition for Have I Got News For You. Whether it's a public holiday, a chunk of tawdry celebrity gossip or a football team getting an absolute leathering; reference it if it fits the bill. Our selection of topical father of the bride speech jokes gets an update more often than a Windows operating system. See, topical right? Kinda.

Displaying 14 topical father of the bride speech jokes

  1. For weddings January 1

    A wedding is a lovely way to begin the new year. It's a fresh start, full of promise and expectation, with all our best hopes for the couple and for the years ahead. It also means (Groom) has a reasonable chance of remembering his anniversary…

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  2. For weddings January 1

    This is actually the same day in history on which Henry VIII married his second wife Anne Boleyn, whom he later beheaded. I have a feeling that in this marriage, when (Bride) loses her head, that still means (Groom) will be the one who’s in trouble.

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  3. For weddings January 1 - January 10

    This is the time of year when people traditionally make New Year's resolutions, and (Bride) and (Groom) are no exception. As they begin their married life together, (Bride) has resolved to make all the important decisions, and (Groom) has resolved to let her. Well, it's worked for her mother and me.

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  4. For weddings January 1 - January 10

    It's great to see (Bride) and (Groom)'s wedding taking place at this time of year - it's the only thing that could possibly keep my wife out of the sales.

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  5. For weddings January 1 - January 10

    It’s wonderful to have a wedding so soon after the revelry of the holidays. Not least if you’re footing the bar bill.

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  6. For weddings January 1 - January 10

    At this time of year it's traditional to look back over the proceeding twelve months. There were natural and economic disasters, carnage, tears, lies and recriminations. But that's enough about (Bride)’s hen weekend.

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  7. For weddings January 1 - January 10

    Earlier today, (Bride) was delighted to see a huge number of people all making their way to the same place in happy anticipation of an exciting, emotional and pleasing day. But she decided that the Marks & Spencer’s sale could wait until after the honeymoon and carried on to the church instead.

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  8. For weddings January 1 - January 10

    (Bride) and (Groom) are marrying at a time of year when we've all had too much to eat and drink, and most of us will be planning to lay off a bit. But there's still room for something delicious, sweet and irresistible. Ladies and gentlemen, the bridesmaids….

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  9. For weddings January 3

    Today's wedding coincides with the date on which Margaret Thatcher became the longest-serving Prime Minister. She was a strong, incredibly powerful woman who would have turned into a quivering wreck had she ever met my daughter.

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  10. For weddings January 20

    On 20th January 1885, L.A Thompson patented the roller coaster. People often say that marriage is a like a roller coaster. Being (Bride's) father, I've merely paid the fee for the ride, and am now patiently standing around waiting for the screaming to start.

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  11. For weddings January 20

    Congratulations (Bride) and (Groom). Did you know you’re getting married seven years to the day that President Obama was elected first black President of the USA? This momentous occasion reminded us that all humans are created equal. On this momentous occasion today, (Groom), we're reminded that not everyone remains equal.

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  12. For weddings January 25

    With it being Burns Night, I thought I'd have a look at what the Bard had to say about marriage. He apparently said 'there are three rings in marriage, the engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering'. Then I found this "She asked why wedding rings are made of gold;
    I ventured this t' instruct her;
    Why, madam, love and lightning are the same,
    On earth they glance, from Heaven they came.
    Love is the soul's electric flame,
    And gold its best conductor."

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  13. For weddings January 27

    Back in 1916 the National Military Service Act was introduced. Although this has long been scrapped, every week, men like (Groom) find themselves put into smart clothes, swearing an allegiance, and following the orders of a commanding officer.

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  14. For weddings January 29

    Did you know it was the official annual ‘Love Your Wife’ day in Japan this week? I don’t know about you but I think that’s a terrific idea! It takes the pressure off for the other 364 days, anyway.

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