Father of the Bride jokes for weddings in August

The best thing you can do to keep any speech relevant and fresh is to have a few topical jokes thrown in to the mix. These should all be related to the day and occasion though; this isn't your audition for Have I Got News For You. Whether it's a public holiday, a chunk of tawdry celebrity gossip or a football team getting an absolute leathering; reference it if it fits the bill. Our selection of topical father of the bride speech jokes gets an update more often than a Windows operating system. See, topical right? Kinda.

Displaying 5 topical father of the bride speech jokes

  1. For weddings August 5-29

    It's perhaps fitting that today's wedding is happening during the Edinburgh Festival. It's a celebration, an enormous party which costs thousands to organise, brings happiness to all but drives some into near bankruptcy. I’m not sure why I mentioned that now.

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  2. For weddings August 3

    It just so happens that the day (Bride & Groom) have chosen to metaphorically ‘set sail’ on their life together, is the very day - August the 3rd - that Christopher Columbus set sail for China on the journey would ultimately lead him to discover the New World. Let’s hope they find just as much wonder on their voyage together, and far fewer tropical diseases.

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  3. For weddings August 11

    It was on August the 11th that the notorious American prison, Alcatraz accepted its first inmates. Think about that. Leaving the home you’ve grown up in for a life of loneliness and unending regime. Of rules and obedience and cruel, cold punishment, stretching out ahead of you until you finally die… Actually, you two, don’t think about that. Forget I said anything! Aren’t the flowers lovely!

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  4. For weddings August 15

    Did you know that on August the 15th, 1848, the dentist’s chair was patented? It’s appropriate really. Here I am, sweating and nervous, hoping nothing rotten comes out of my mouth.

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  5. For weddings August 22

    Of course, every man likes to feel he’s the King of his own castle, but you should take a lesson from history before you go throwing your weight around. On August the 22nd, 1642, Charles the First decided to flex his muscles by calling Parliament and its army ‘traitors’, and we all know where that got him. Take my advice, (Groom), learn to share the power, and you might come out the other side with your head still attached to your shoulders.

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